I was recently at an overnight camp with about 50 Grade Five students and I’ve realized some things just never ever change:
The girl drama is still rampant and the goss (that’ gossip for all you oldies that don’t know what it means) is still flying, big time. The dialogue is everything. And, I mean…like, everything.
“OMG…she said ______”.
“And then I was like ________”.
“So then I ________”.
“OMG can you believe that?”
As I sat there and listened to the drama I remembered feeling all those emotions. I thought to myself “Man, everything is just so BIG at that age”. Even the discussion about who took whose shoes and who knocked on whose doors…they’re big. Big problem. Big drama. So. Much. Energy.
I found myself rolling my eyes and thinking “Jesus, this is what they worry about?“.
Then, I checked myself. I was the same when I was their age. The little problems were BIG problems. That one sentence you said about so-and-so can determine how life will go for the next few weeks and if you screw it up…you may find yourself sitting alone at recess. It’s odd…but…it’s not abnormal. Don’t even get me started on the riveting game of Truth or Date.
I truly believe that it’s not only confidence and discovering who we are that aids in our ability to not give a flying fuck about what is said about us. I think we’re just tired.
“Omg…she said ______”...something I totally don’t give a fuck about.
“And then I was like_____”… okay…you go do you, I’ll be over here trying to figure out how to squeeze 25 hours into this day.
“So then I ______”…stopped at Tim Horton’s and picked up an XL coffee to help me through the day.
“OMG can you believe that?”…Yup, totally can and totally don’t care.
The dialogue changes when you’re older. The big things aren’t big and you let a lot more slide off your back.
People will constantly try to pull you down, put you down, make you feel shitty…and I’m just so very tired that I truly don’t have the energy to fight against them. I don’t want to and I don’t care. I don’t have the energy.
I need to conserve my energy for the shit that matters. The time spent worrying about the shit said about me is, well, a waste of my precious energy. So, I let it fly because I simply don’t have the energy to give to that kind of chatter any longer.
Go ahead and talk your talk and do your thang, Little Miss Gossip. Me? I’m just over here trying to raise kind humans, inspire a nation and lead by example….on a thread of the energy I used to have to worry about whether “OMG…she’s wearing the same shirt as I am!”
Sure, I’ve screwed up, made mistakes, etc…but I’m also too tired to give a fuck about anything that doesn’t help me move and grow as a human any longer. I have no time for the bullshit and want to only surround myself with people who bring the good energy back into my world. I’m too tired to give a fuck about the rest of it.
Truly. In my 41st year of life…I finally get it. And, I have complete and total fatigue to thank for it. Thank you bone-deep fatigue for truly allowing me to focus on the important stuff in my life and let the other shit go. It is quite liberating. For once, I truly see the benefit of getting older…and being tired.
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